electrically charged

I'm pretty sure that I'm electrically charged.  I have come to this conclusion based on several different situations.  1 every time i touch my car, like every single time I set off a static charge that I can see, it's now to the point where I'm scared to close the door.

Secondly, I've gone through 2 laptop power chargers over the last 2 days, when i plug it into the wall, blue sparks come out.

The final one is that now my battery in my car is dead.  It was running perfectly yesterday but now seems to be resting in peace.  

The weather people are calling for thunder and lightening later, if I get hit by lightening  tonight then I guess I was given all the signs to stay away.  

Shimmy and Shake,

Topsytuvy