While You Were In South Dakota

Political Update

2009-10-02T15:49:00.008-04:00

This pretty much speaks for itself.*

http://john.tricyber.com/kern/

*This post is in no way an endorsement for this candidate. This blog has and always will maintain a neutrality in all things political.

I know the blogs been pretty dormant, but...

2009-01-12T00:58:00.002-05:00

Ray Charles is a madman. I've recently been enjoying the southern soft soul of Ray Charles, and for the most part he's lyrically and vocally a genius, but while listening to his song understanding I noticed the following lyrics...

* Understanding is the best thing in the world ,
between a boy and a girl

boy and girl and even a woman or a man , its always
better when you realy understand

You know understanding is a mighty powerful thing ,
thats why it makes me so sad
when I see my friends wandering aroung thru the world
, never knowing the meaning of the word
understanding , so in the next few minutes, Im gonna
try to explain just exactly what it means

**Everything sounds pretty good, teach us Ray**

now wait a minute, listen , for instance , you take me
and my old lady , we gotta good thing goin
because I know If I dont work and pay the rent and the
bills and buy her fine pretty clothes to wear well ,
there are fifteen other guys just waitin round the
corner , and I dont care how much that woman loves me
, she'll gonna go out and find herself one of them who
will and thats why I believe that

**A little sexist but, whatever**

Now listen I dont want you to think that this is a
one sided affair , no no
because my old lady also understands that a man must
have respect
what I mean is , if she must play around dont let me
catch her , because what I dont see cant hurt me , you
understand? but on the other hand , If I should ever
catch her Im not gonna talk about-a
and call her a bunch of bad names like you all might
no no mh
what Im gonna do , Im gonna go down-town to the
hardware store and buy myself a double blade axe ,
come back , square off, and believe her souls gonna
belong to the good lord
because her heads gonna belong to me , and I
guarantie shelll know what I mean when Ill say

*WHAT?!?! He doesnt mind that she cheats, but if he catches he's gonna chop her head off.....MADMAN**

**Denotes my commentary, not actual lyrics**

We Won the World Series

2008-10-30T03:52:00.001-04:00

2008-10-09T13:09:00.000-04:00

i forget how to embed videos. wah wah wah. click the link.

http://consumerist.com/5060872/japan-introduces-monkey-waiters-blogger-scratches-another-business-plan-off-his-list

OCTOBER

2008-10-01T17:51:00.001-04:00

Get Scared!!!

mishik

2008-08-05T22:27:00.001-04:00

mishik i mish u

Unbelievable

2008-07-16T17:16:00.003-04:00

So i know I haven't posted in a while, but I figure this story is worth rekindling my love affair with the blog, so with no further adieu i give you my morning yesterday.....

I wake up from a 10 and a half hour night sleep at 9:00 am Tuesday morning. (This was a much needed night's sleep, since i had amassed the same amount of sleep in the previous 3 nights.) I felt very refreshed and ready to take on whatever the day had in store for me. I got my quick routine shower while listening to Rob Bass, and grabbed a banana for my walk to work.

Just an average walk, except for whatever reason everyone kept asking me if I knew where things in the area were, as if I was the king of the illadelph.

Where's the Commerce Bank?

Where's the (UPenn) admissions office? (Multiple times)

Am I closer to American Apparel or the Gap?

Is there a sit-down restaurant within walking distance to my current location?

Now normally having to turn down my jams and stop eating my banana and drinking my glass of water would put me in a very disgruntled mood, but like I said I was refreshed. After all of this I was already 3 blocks away from World Cafe Live, and I had barely started on my banana, so I returned to the routine.

As I walked down Walnut between 34th and 33rd street I saw a blue compact car pull into a spot on the front of hte block. Nothing special. But then the driver got out and he went to help the passenger out of the back seat. This struck me as odd being that a relatively beat looking car was being used to chauffer someone of notariety. Probably some lame Penn guest speaker, economist, or BS author, or historian, or something nerds would like. Nothing to impress my Rock N' Roll lifestyle.

Until the passenger steps out of the automobile. An old man seemingly from central Asian decent...maybe China, probably Mongolia, potentially even Tibet. This man is wearing only a red robe of sorts with yellow undertones, and I think to myself he looks important... Is that the dalai lama. But I figure I'm just letting pre-conceived biases get to me, and that there's no way his holiness is on our street, but I realize I've been staring at him for about 3 seconds. (don't think thats long stare at a stranger and count to 3, you'll see.) So I give him the eyebrows... ya know that ones that say "welcome, to phildealphia." since I am the king and outward representative of the city.

As I watch the news today I found out the Dalai Lama was in town and as they show an image of him on the tv I am confirmed that I did in fact give the dalai lama the eyebrows.

update on life

2008-07-07T20:04:00.001-04:00

ben franklin and thomas jefferson won a couple games of beer pong the other night until ashlee and jessica simpson beat them.

life is good.

shimmy

tops

TorieTabloid -- Post 5 (and go germany)

2008-06-27T19:27:00.003-04:00

I am currently in Ye Olde Torie Land (doing some serious recon in preparation for the coming year in Ye Olde Fake Town). Apparently Benjamin Franklin has people following me because I found a rather interesting paper lying on the bar today when I was at the pub for lunch (that's actually serious -- I guess that I really am haunted). So, in honor of Jesus, who knew how to throw down by turning water into wine, I present to you "Water or Wine" by Comrade Benjamin Franklin:

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine -- and those who don't,
As Ben Franklin said, "In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria." In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year, we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli (E. coli) -- bacteria found in faeces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine and beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey, or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. So, remember: water = poop, wine = health.

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as public service

So there you have it...straight from our favourite boozehound. Now, go tell it on a mountain as the famous Green Mountain Man, David Beckham did in 1568 on the eve of the great battle between the Djiboutian and the Swiss Navy.

I'd like an Aristotle of the tallest toff in the scruff, but I have to face the apples and pears later, so I will just stick with a cup of Rosie Lee.

Cheerio,
lambsblood27

p.s. Please note the Deutschland colors in preparation for the Euro Cup final on Sunday. Let's go Germany!!! Deutschland, Deutschland uber alles...UBER ALLES IN DIE WELT!!!

2008-06-23T22:18:00.001-04:00

blop a flop u stupid mop, jesus cant i get a freaking break.

peace out

MISSING IN ACTION

2008-06-06T08:39:00.001-04:00

I FLY LIKE PAPER GET HIGH LIKE PLANES

a lonely blogger

2008-06-05T11:36:00.000-04:00

i think im the only person that blogs anymore. i'm going to start a revolution. more blogging...now!!

boston trip

2008-06-02T10:58:00.002-04:00

After 9 hours of driving and listening to continuous b101 I can only recall little things that I planned on blogging about specifically referencing a backstreet boys song, shania twain, and eric clapton. They all had really good themes that i was going to associate with the back and forth driving from nj to pa numerous times. either way after learning about penguins, photo taking with chinese chefs, performing social idiot antics, creating the most amazing third eye blind video, throwing up at least 4 times (reference car sickness and food poisoning not alcohol related), forgetting my keys 3 hours into the journey back, Cripus Attucks, the creation of Johnny Mets...probably more

anyway back to class

TopsT

baddabing

2008-05-30T08:52:00.002-04:00

so apparently wawa doesn't have breakfast sandwiches before 5 am. What's up with that? How do people on the radio get their food if wawa isn't serving nice hot meals before 5 o'clock.

i'm going to die before noon today. there's no way i'm going to last.

someone save me.

shimmy and shake,

TopsyTU

yo yo yo

2008-05-28T09:23:00.001-04:00

welcome back scout!

Weekend Cliff Notes

2008-05-27T17:31:00.002-04:00

A postless weekend can only mean one thing... a long action-packed weekend. Thanks to the holiday, there were 5 days and nights of fun. A weekend that revolved around its culminating return bbq, was sure to be a memorable one when rumors of mudslides and snowstorms cancelled the return from Utah. Here's the shortened versions.

Free Tix For Duran Duran

Rum

Incubus mouthing off to bouncers

Minimal Techno

McDonalds

Stick It

Sandlot

Vision Quests

Green Stripes

Islands

Rooftop Sitting

Reggae Night

Social Retardation

12 Hour Treks

Playing with dogs in Rittenhouse

Casinos

Winning Big on the Nickles ($0.35)

Beer in taco bell cups on the beach

Black & Milds

"What Legs Lisa?"

The Bump/The Mashed Potato

Skee Ball

Drinking Mudslides

Qwink

Apples To Apples

Bagles

Run The Bases

BBQ

UNCLE FRANK!

Psyching Out

Everyone Doing The Bump

Joker's Wild.

what have i become

2008-05-27T13:53:00.002-04:00

i'm not sure if i should make some kind of bulleted list to describe the Best Memorial Day Weekend Ever or if i should write some kind of sprawling narrative but i'll just start with the list and see where i end up

- THE BUUUUMP
- lion lion roar roar hunting hunting hunting hunting
- pasta party with uncle frank
- apples to apples with uncle frank
- uncle frank dancing like ellen degeneres
- beers in mcdonalds cups
- whammo
- turning into dirtbags
- 24/7 arcades
- atlantic city nickel and penny slots
- my robot soul

i guess the sprawling narrative didnt really work out WHATEVER

update from two days ago

2008-05-23T19:07:00.004-04:00

1>i need to learn to shake my hips more like lead singer from duran duran.

2>throwed off almost loves duran duran as much as viral incubus.

3>i like stupid movies (anaconda)

4>this is my personal diary

5>tesseract performs the most amazing slide/running man on steps ever

6>hawkeye scores the best tickets to shows

7>bull ruth is an alter ego that no one will ever be able to explain

8>dragon_lord has the ability to appear whenever wherever

9>windfall loves obama and hates that other stupid bitch

10>sum41 is catching a second wind

11>take it off culinary colt

-topsT

Slingshot Dakota and Iced Tea.

2008-05-23T14:21:00.003-04:00

There was a sweet free show yesterday at AKA music. The Brooklyn/Easton guy/girl drum/keyboard duo of Slingshot Dakota played a short but very sweet set upstairs at the record store. They were described to me as "Like Mates of State if they were good." Now, I love Mates Of State, so I figured these guys would be great too. The drummer played in underwear and a tshirt, and smashed the drums as if they had raped his sister. He was merciless on those skins. And the keyboardist/cutie Carly was adorable and full of energy. Fantastic band, you should check them out. Afterwards Algernon Cadwallader played, but I had to leave by that time. I thought the show would happen earlier, but it got started about an hour late, and Algernon didn't even show up until an hour and a half after they were supposed to. This sucks, because I haven't seen them in almost a year now, and I really love watching them play. Boo.

However, there is a more important point to this post. After the show I bought some amazing iced tea. Seriously, it was mind-boggling. I've been exploring the world of real tea (not nestea or lipton, or Celestial Seasonings or any of that stuff, I'm talking fresh off the bush from Sri Lanka type shit) lately, and I really love maté teas. They have a delicious dark tea flavor with a hint of chocolate and cream in the aftertaste. They're truly amazing. Not to mention all the health benefits plus their high superiority to coffee when it comes to caffeine and alertness. The tea I bought was Herbal Mist brand. It's all natural, and sweetened with cane sugar, not corn syrup o' death. So the sweetness was real, but not overpowering. The tea actually filled me up for an hour or two. I hadn't eaten much that day, and I planned on grabbing a sweet vegan chocolate banana cookie at my favorite coffeeshop, but the tea pretty much made me feel like I was full. I still bought the cookie, but I wasn't really hungry anymore. This feeling of fullness lasted a few hours until I went to the Duran Duran show, where I became hungry like a wolf.

Conclusion:

1, Listen to Slingshot Dakota if you like guy/girl, drum/piano, awesome/cute music

2, Drink Herbal Mist tea if you like delicious as hell drinks that keep you awake and nourish you. Also, if anyone sees this tea anywhere in Philly, please let me know where you found it, because I need to get it on a regular basis, and the only store I know of that carries it is at 2nd and Market.

Thank you.

Oh, thursdays.

2008-05-22T14:12:00.001-04:00

The internet rules

But sometimes I still get bored

Need more webcomics.

Celebrity Run-Ins: Topanga

2008-05-22T12:23:00.006-04:00

Sorry its taken so long to post these but enjoy...

Kirk touched her hand.

Victims of Conformity

2008-05-22T12:26:00.000-04:00

the nightmare i survived

2008-05-22T11:24:00.002-04:00

nyfanmm11 (11:18:07 AM): i was traveling with someone

nyfanmm11 (11:18:26 AM): and we had like become famous for doing something

nyfanmm11 (11:18:31 AM): and we were gonna make a lot of money

nyfanmm11 (11:18:41 AM): so we were driving across the country to go do it

nyfanmm11 (11:18:55 AM): and we joked around about ppl making threats to us

nyfanmm11 (11:19:00 AM): and i told all of them to fuck off

nyfanmm11 (11:19:17 AM): so we were driving

nyfanmm11 (11:19:30 AM): and i had a premonition i was in this other car

nyfanmm11 (11:19:33 AM): and there was a gun

nyfanmm11 (11:19:40 AM): so then i realized it was the same road as us

nyfanmm11 (11:19:47 AM): then all of a sudden we stopped

nyfanmm11 (11:20:04 AM): then i was like fuck this guy is in traffic with us tyring to kill us

friendlynigerian (11:20:14 AM): hahahahaha

nyfanmm11 (11:20:14 AM): so my friend didnt want to leave but i was like im out

nyfanmm11 (11:20:20 AM): and the guy found our car

nyfanmm11 (11:20:32 AM): and somehow put bombs in the back

nyfanmm11 (11:20:37 AM): and i was like we gotta get out

nyfanmm11 (11:20:53 AM): and then i knew the guy was in the trunk cuz i could hear his raspy voice

nyfanmm11 (11:20:59 AM): so i left

nyfanmm11 (11:21:18 AM): and then my friend came out of the car as i was walking away and was like stoppp hes fine hes cool

nyfanmm11 (11:21:26 AM): and the guy walked behind my friend

nyfanmm11 (11:21:34 AM): and then the cops shot

nyfanmm11 (11:21:36 AM): the guy

friendlynigerian (11:21:40 AM): jesus

nyfanmm11 (11:21:41 AM): cuz they saw he had a gun

nyfanmm11 (11:21:49 AM): and my friend and i survived

nyfanmm11 (11:21:56 AM): that was the hole dream

friendlynigerian (11:22:50 AM): hahahaha jesus

read at your own risk

2008-05-21T21:22:00.002-04:00

bla bla bla....bla bla bla...beware...gotcha

My Current State of Mind

2008-05-21T20:55:00.001-04:00